the parable of the test retake

Once upon a time I started cosmetology school. While there, I found out that to graduate, you must get 70% or higher on every test. The problem came when I found out to be considered for honor roll status at graduation, you have to get 90% or higher. 90 PERCENT!? Who can consistently commit themselves to A's on TESTS?

I started freaking out. Wondering how hard the tests would be and how often they'd occur. I wanted to get test reviews early so I could force my husband to help me study every night. What if I didn't get above 90%? What if I couldn't even get above 70%? I started to feel inadequate. It seemed hopeless, even for me.

Then I found out something life-changing. You can retake tests. Over and over. As many times as you need. Even if you pass with a 70%, you can retake the test until you get a score that reflects the knowledge you want it to.

Since that day I've reflected on that concept and how it reflects the Atonement of Jesus Christ. No matter how many times we mess up, we get to retake our tests in life. We may lose our cool with a family member today, but chances are good that we will get another opportunity to retake that test. When we forget or "forget" to pray one night, we get to retake that test and try again the next day.

"However late you think you are, however many chances you think you have missed, however many mistakes you feel you have made or talents you think you don't have, or however far from home and family and God you feel you have traveled, I testify that you have not traveled beyond the divine love. It is not possible for you to sink lower than the infinite light of Christ's atonement shines."

(Jeffrey R. Holland)

For every mistake, there is always a retake. And we get to retake those tests because of Christ, our brother, our friend, our confident and our Savior. 

sephora gift card giveaway

It's the most wonderful day of the month! My sponsors are here to give you something wonderful... $15 to Sephora! There's not too many entries, and I wholeheartedly LOVE these sponsors of mine. Best of luck!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

i didn't marry him to change him

When my husband proposed, I said "Yes." There was no hesitation, and I never doubted my decision. I knew we would make each other happy. I knew we would be best friends, lovers, and each others support system. And later when chatting with a friend, she said, "Do you think he'll change after marriage? Do you hope he'll get better?"

After much thought about the subject I realized something. I didn't marry him to change HIM, I married him to change ME.

I married him because often times he challenged every view I'd ever had, and changed my perspective. I married him because he encourages me to be more than I used to be, yet loves me just as I am right now. I married him because he helps me be my best self, and I want to be better when I'm with him. I didn't marry him because I thought I could change him. I married him because I wanted my marriage to strengthen me as an individual. I wanted it to make me more compassionate, more understanding, and more caring.

Growing up, I loved to date what you could call, "charity cases." I found boys who were a little rough around the edges, and used my feminine ways to encourage them to change for the better. I dated these boys because I considered myself better than them. And it was damaging. For their lives and my own.

I was disappointed that when I left them alone they would fall back into old habits of pornography. I'd see them posting curse words on Facebook and Instagram. I'd find out they were in juvy for drug use. I'd find out they were running away from a foster home that loved and protected them. I dated them all. I assumed that I could change them, I could be the difference. And that background, and many failed attempts of changing them made me realize that I couldn't change them. They would have to do that themselves.

We weren't designed to change others, inspire others? Sure. Encourage one another? You bet. But if you get married expecting to change your husband, you might be disappointed to find that the person who changes the most in your eyes is YOU.

And that's why I married my husband. Because his life, his personality, his characteristics and his love changed ME. And if you ask him, he'll tell you he married me for the same reason.

what do YOU want to know about mormon's?

I get asked a lot of questions about my religion here on this blog, and I want to start answering them for all of you! For those of you who don't know, I'm a Mormon. The complete name of the church I belong to is The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Sometimes we can seem to be a peculiar people, no doubt about that!

So feel free to ask your questions in the comments below, or if you'd like to stay more anonymous, you may email me at brooklynburton@hotmail.com with topic line as MORMON QUESTION. I will start answering your questions on my blog asap!

putting myself in TIME OUT

This past weekend I had the amazing opportunity to attend a women's conference called "Time Out for Women." My husband and friends spent the weekend joking that I was put in time out because I'd been bad. But really, I'd been put in time out because I needed a weekend of uplifting speakers inspiring me to be better!

I always take a lot of notes because I want to remember everything that is being said and taught. So I decided to take a few of my favorite notes I took and share them with you.

________________________

Pray to learn to love others in a new kind of way.

Hold LIGHTLY to the things of this world, and TIGHTLY to the things of heaven.

In order to make the world a better place, we must first make our homes the best place.

Happy fathers make happy families. And happy wives make happy fathers!

Difficulties allow us to change for the beter.

Let no one ever be confused about what you believe and who you worship.

When we allow others to shine & celebrate their light, we shine a little brighter too.

When trying to discover your dreams think of...
what you loved as a child
feminine strengths
favorite church calling
when you feel strong

Lasting change is accomplished through simple changes made over a long period of time.

Once you discover your relationship with God, the things that others think & say about you matter less.

Any time you want to complain, make sure you put "Dear Heavenly Father..." in front of it.

_______________________

love story part fourteen: choosing a date and a temple

After much deliberation, Mr. Jolley and I decided that since we knew we wanted to get married, there was no sense in waiting around forever to do so. The talking for an official date began.

Mr. Jolley thought August 30th would be perfect because his birthday is August 31st and mine is September 1st. I wasn't so sure I wanted all those fun dates right next to each other, but I decided it could be an excited 3 day non stop party every year. We decided to book the temple.

But... which one? I'd always imagined myself getting married in the Ogden, UT temple like my parents, but that temple was under construction for another year.

Logan, UT seemed like the next best option because it was the temple I went to while I went to college. But that was SO far away from all of his family, and not super conveinent for our reception plans.

We decided since we were going to be living in Salt Lake, and it was a more central location for all our family, that it would be the perfect temple. Plus, it makes for great wedding photos!

We booked the date. August 30th. 

Then after talking with our closest family members (and no one else, because we weren't OFFICIALLY engaged yet) we realized that date was not going to work.

So we found another date a few weeks earlier so it would be before everyone's school was back in session. A day after my old roommate's wedding, and perfect timing for my husband's work schedule. We called the temple and rescheduled our date.

August 16, 2013.

Mormon mommy planner review & giveaway

I've been looking around for a planner that would be sufficient enough for me. I used Erin Condren last year and although I loved it, I'm even more excited to introduce this new planner that I've fallen head over heels for.

If you're a Mom, you NEED this planner. It's got a place for FHE plans, monthly budgets and even a Book of Mormon reading chart.

The weekly layout is gorgeous, and has a spot to record your daily prayer, scriptures, exercise and meditation.

Not a Mormon Mommy? There is also a planner created for young adults with many of the same features but more directed for that age group. 

I have LOVED using this planner and get compliments on it every time I pull it out. And guess what? Today we're giving one away! Enter below for your own free planner!

  a Rafflecopter giveaway

7 day challenge: love yourself more

I'm starting a new monthly feature on this ole blog... a 7 Day Challenge to encourage positive personal change. And as I was pondering and praying over what the first challenge should be I decided to go with something almost every woman struggles with... loving herself.

Each day will be laid out with specific assignments, each taking around 10 minutes or less. Will you commit? If so, grab the image below and share on social media! Let's spread this love!

Day 1: Inspire Yourself

Read up on other bloggers that make your feel better about yourself.

Search for inspiring quotes on Pinterest.

Read self-help books.

Google "ways to love yourself"

Etc.

Day 2: Make a List

Write a list of 3 things you love about yourself & 1 thing you'd like to change.

Day 3: Set a goal

Create an action goal that will help you become that one thing you'd like to change.

Day 4: Send this message to someone who cares about you

"I'm participating in a 7 day love yourself challenge and today's challenge is to ask someone I care about to tell me a few positive qualities I have. I'm wondering if you would be willing to do it for me!"

Day 5: Physically Manifest

Write a positive quote/goal reminder on a sticky note and put it on your mirror.

Change your iphone background to something inspiring.

Write a facebook post that has a positive message.

Etc.

Day 6: Treat Yourself

Take a long bath.

Book a massage.

Buy yourself something you've been wanting for awhile.

Treat yourself to flowers.

Write in your journal.

Go visit an old friend.

Reorganize your closet.

Whatever makes you feel happy!

Day 7: Record & Reflect

Write in your journal or in a blog post what you've learned, how you feel, and what you're going to do about it!

Be sure to use #7dayloveyourself challenge so I can see all your posts, and watch for mine! Follow me on Instagram to see my updates with @brooklynjolley 

Love story part 13: ring shopping

Once Mr. Jolley knew I would marry him, we decided it was time to start ring shopping. I sent him pictures from Pinterest and started researching what kind of a ring I wanted. He'd tell me which ones he liked, and sent me pictures of ones he thought I might like as well.

We decided that for date night sometime we needed to go try on rings for me, because what if the kind of ring I wanted looked weird on my hand or something! 

Problem was, Mr. Jolley had a grown up job. 9-5 Monday through Friday. Which happens to be the operating hours for most jewelers. So we went to Kohls and Walmart on a weeknight at 9 PM to try on rings. It was hilarious and not ideal, but it at least helped us get an idea of what I wanted. 

It was so exciting. Talking with the salespeople about potential wedding dates, telling them our whirlwind love story, and trying on rings thinking "I'm actually getting married to this man!" 

After trying on a few and showing Mr. Jolley the kinds I liked, he said he wanted to try and pick a few I might like and I could say whether I liked them or not. Every single one he pointed to I loved. I told him the ring could be a surprise, just like he wanted it to be.

 And then it was time to wait for a proposal...

Caper 2014

Last week I had the AMAZING opportunity to go to a Paul Mitchell systems education event in Las Vegas! We spent three days learning from the top stylists in all of Paul Mitchell!

We had a long 7 hour bus ride that started early in the morning and meant I had to be awake at 4:30! Waaaay too early, but luckily I slept a little on the bus. 

We made it to our hotel, Ceasars Palace!

The first day we spent shopping the mall that was IN our hotel and walking the strip.

We tried Coke flavors from around the world. 

And then my mom decided to make me really homesick and sent me a pic of my husband and dad enjoying their time at the Harlem Globetrotters. 

The next day was the Opening Session. There were elbows thrown for good seats let me tell ya. 

Make models were in abundance, and it only made me miss my husband more! 

Surprise guest Marie Osmond! She showed up to talk about fundraising for good causes and how we can help.

All black everyday y'all.

There was an all white party where I showed off my moves like I haven't in years. Lots of booty shakin people. And we also met hair celeb Kelly Cardenas!

                            

The last day was full of color and cutting classes with big name people. I learned a lot of tips and tricks and left so inspired to make my mark in the beauty industry! 

date night: build a bear

This was our first valentines day together! I know that might seem weird since I've been married 6 months, but I only knew my husband 8 weeks before getting engaged. So this time last year I was a single lady! Weird to think right?

But this year for valentines day we decided to go to Chickfila for dinner, and then hit up Build a Bear because I've been DYING to go. 

We had a blast! It was silly and cute and made me laugh like a little girl again. I also had the hardest time picking which bear I wanted. #decisionchallenged 

Mr. Jolley decided it was mandatory that my bear receive flowers, and I just had to have that purple headband, I showed it to my husband and he said "That's SO Brooklyn." He knows me too well. 

Have you ever been to Build a Bear on a date?

ask Brooklyn february 2014

I don't know about you guys, but I am absolutely loving this series. It is such a fun opportunity for me to answer your questions. So let's get Rollin...

Do you have any blogging tips or tricks to share? 

I actually am going to start a monthly series all about the things I've learned in blogging! So that's exciting! But my best advice is to be yourself, blog about things you love, and make connections. Decide what blogging means to you, and do what works for you. 

What do you look like with your natural hair color? Would you ever consider going back to it? 

That's the most recent picture I can find of myself before I ever dyed my hair. I slowly added in blonde highlights and just feel like being a lighter blonde is more flattering on me. 

I'd maybe consider going back to my natural color, but not right now. I love being blonde way too much ;) 

What is your least favorite food? 

Fish. Any and all kinds. Ew.

Do you ever get tired of talking about marriage and relationship goals? Will that continue to be the main focus of your blog?

My blog tagline is "a blog about faith, marriage, and positive personal change." I try to blog about a variety of things, Disney, hair, blogging, etc. But the truth is, I'm a newlywed. So my biggest focus right now is figuring out how to rock this first year of marriage.

 Because I use my blog to document my life and inspire others, one of the main focuses of my blog will continue to be marriage. I've always had a passion for learning about relationships, and now I'm finally living my happily ever after and I intend to share my goals about it with all of you.

What kind of music do you usually listen to? 

Country! Although I do listen to a little bit of everything. 

Do you get offended by people who bash on those who give marriage advice who haven't been married long? 

Ya know, I actually experienced this pretty recently. Last month I saw a post someone wrote about how much she hated seeing newlyweds dish out marriage advice and immediately went on defense. Was it about me? Why would she be so cruel? Then I took inventory of my blog. 

I really try hard to not say "all married couples need to do this..." Or "marriage advice for a happier marriage!" I try to say "what I do in my marriage that makes me happier" or "3 things I've learned about relationships" etc. Because I DO like sharing the things I've learned. But I definitely don't know everything about marriage. I've only been married 6 months! 

So I've learned to push those kinda of comments aside. Because if you don't want to read about my marriage, you don't have to. And I love being inspired by posts that other wives are writing about what they've learned even if they've only been married a few months, so maybe others like reading about the same on my blog. In other words, it's my blog, and I do what I want ;)

And that's a wrap for Ask Brooklyn this month! Don't forget you can ask your questions for next month by clicking HERE! Happy Monday everyone!

Happy 6 months

CHOOSE YOUR LOVE

LOVE YOUR CHOICE. 

(Thomas S Monson)

Happy 6 months of marriage my love. 

3 days away...

This past week Monday through Wednesday I attended an amazing educational event for Paul Mitchell cosmetology students in Las Vegas, Nevada!

Since I got married almost 6 months ago, I've spent a total amount of ONE night away from my husband. Three days was TOO long. I didn't want to be annoying and complain the whole time, I mean, I was in Vegas after all! But the truth is, I love my husband. He is my sunshine. He is my best friend. And being away from him for three days was torture! I was so grateful to get back to normal life and cuddle up to him at night. 

You may call that pathetic, but you try watching The Time Traveler's Wife while you are away from your husband! ;)

Speaking of loving husbands, this month I have had the honor of getting to know an amazing wife. Her name is Jana. And if you're looking for a blog design, she's your girl!

I asked her what her favorite part of being was and she said this...

"I love that no matter what happens in my life, I have someone to go through it with. The future doesn't scare me because I know that my best friend will be standing right beside me, and has my back through anything. I also love being that rock and that support for my husband as well! It's wonderful to feel so needed."

She's a blogging guru too, sharing the 10 Thing I Wish I Knew When I Started Blogging. I'm always checking her blog for her latest post and not just because she's a sponsor, but because she has an amazing blog that is just my style. 

I asked her if she set New Year's Resolutions and she replied...

"I sure did, and for the first time, I'm actually keeping them! This year, I set my goals a little differently than I have in the past, and it has made things so much easier. Instead of setting tons of goals, I created a theme to focus on each month--this month is strengthening my relationship with my husband. :)"

And who's her role model?

"I love Ann Romney! Not only is she super classy, but she is such a strong woman. I love reading her stories about when she was a young mother, because I relate to her so much I am also so in awe of how amazingly supportive she is of her husband and how firm she stands in her faith, even when her entire life and many beliefs she held so dear were under public scrutiny, and even criticized."

She's got an amazing sponsorship program that I'm looking into joining next month as well. Who's your favorite person to sponsor?

Now get over there and follow this amazing lady, unless you hate blogs that inspire you to be better. Stay far far away.

why it is so important to document our lives

I used to be a fabulous journal keeper. It was something I prided myself in, and loved to do. I also love to read back through stories of my life, and lessons learned. Now I blog, and my journal has taken a bit of a backseat to my blog life. But I'm trying to write it in more. But why?

                                           ______________________________

“We sometimes forget that the everyday world around us now quickly becomes altered by time. People and experiences now very common to us become unfamiliar in just a short time. People whom we think will be our close friends forever move away, and we lose contact. Relatives, now important in our lives, die. Old buildings are replaced by new structures. Kids’ games, teenage social customs, family daily activities, Church activities, and styles in dress and music change. So do our personal concerns, interests, tastes, abilities, and goals. WE CHANGE. Scene by scene, therefore, our lives should be reflected in our journal as fully and as accurately as possible.” 
(William G. Hartley, “Diary and Journal Ideas,” New Era, Mar. 1977, 39) 

                                         ______________________________

We change, and do the people and situations around us. That's why I blog, that's why I journal. Because I want to remember it all. I want to look back and see how far I've come. I want to look back and say, "Do you remember....?"

why we work

We work because a 21 year old boy brought his blind date flowers, and has kept on bringing them ever since.

We work because when he's had a stressful day at work, I don't pester him with questions, I just cuddle him close and remind him how he is my whole world. 

We work because even though I put the toothpaste in a different drawer every night, he just laughs at the silliness of it. 

We work because when we disagree, we never yell. 

We work because we both say yes to each other, even when the demands are not convenient.

We work because we read from the scriptures and pray together every evening.

We work because I call him handsome and he calls me his Bhoney, his Brooklyn honey.

We work because he lets me listen to my country music radio every morning on the radio, and we always listen to his stations in the evening. 

We work because some nights it's TacoTime, and some nights it's Chickfila.

We work because we never listen to the naysayers, and we know our relation is between us, and no one else.

We work because we cuddle every night before bed, and we always say I love you. 

We work because we choose to work for it. We choose to overlook flaws, and celebrate strengths. We work because we both think we are getting the better end of the deal. And we work because we put each other first, and live our lives in a Christ-centered home. We work because love has no explanation, and because love is all the answers. 

those crazy mormon's: what is fast sunday?

"Those Crazy Mormons" is a blog series dedicated to answering common questions about Mormon beliefs, culture, and history. If you have further questions, please feel free to email me at brooklynjolley@hotmail.com. 

On the first Sunday of the month (with few exceptions), members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (aka Mormon's) abstain from food or drink for two meals. We are encouraged to donate the money we would've spent on those meals to the Church. The Church then takes that money and uses it to help local poor and needy families. 

Fasting means to go without food and drink voluntarily for a certain period of time. If you fast and are praying sincerely it can bring you closer to God, strengthen you spiritually, and prepare ourselves for blessings. Fasting teaches us self-control helping us put aside the "natural man" and our "human appetites" which increases our spiritual power, protecting us from Satan.

The first hour of the regular 3 hour Sunday block is a little different on Fast Sunday as well. Instead of assigned speakers, the pulpit is opened up to the congregation for what is called Fast & Testimony Meeting. Members may voluntarily go to the pulpit and share their testimony with the congregation. 

Although fasting is a gospel principle I STILL struggle with, and my stomach is always growly on Fast Sunday, I've seen its effects on my life. I love how empowered I feel after I fast, and I love knowing that those meals are going to someone who needs them even more than I do.

To read more about Fasting check out these articles:

The Law of the Fast

Blessings We Give, Blessings We Receive

I Have a Question

3 MUST DO rides at Disneyland for the thrill seeker

1. Indiana Jones Adventure

When people ask me what my favorite Disneyland ride is, this is usually my answer. You enter into jeeps and embark on a fast and rugged adventure. It's SO fun and has a really cool illusion at the end. The key to this ride is to get a FastPass early on in order to avoid 60+ minute wait times. The cool thing about the line though is that as you wait you go through caverns and caves. My dad used to try and scare us, so be nice to your kids ;)

46" and taller

2. Star Tours-- The Adventure Continues

Star Tours is a remake of an old ride and let me tell you, it is back in full force! (pun intended) This is a 3D motion simulated ride so avoid if you get motion sick easy. A cool thing about this ride is there are over 50 different combinations you can experience. It's never the same ride twice! They also choose a "rebel spy" at the beginning of the ride, which is a photo of someone on the ride with you or possibly you! (I was the rebel spy on our honeymoon and it was hilarious) If you've wondered what the force feels like, you'll find out on this ride. With some of the highest technology, Disney knocks it out of the park with this one!

40" and taller

3. Space Mountain

With real-life astronaut Gordon Cooper as a creative consultant for the ride, you know you're getting an awesome out of this world experience. Big drops in the dark make for an extra fun time. You also get your photo taken at an inopportune time which makes for a hilarious souvenier. I'd recommend heading to this ride right at park opening, because as the day goes on and the park gets busier so does this ride. 

40" and taller

What Disneyland ride do you go to for thrills?

how to survive valentines day as a single

Valentine's Day is just around the corner, and love it or hate it, it's going to happen. This year is actually my first year in 20 years that I won't be spending it as a single! So over the years I've learned to turn my 2nd favorite holiday into a great day whether or not I had a man.

1. Throw a party for all the singles you know.

Watch a chick-flick, bake cookies, go out to dinner as a group. Do anything! Just do it with others so you'll feel less lonely. Staying occupied will help keep your brain from creating the idea of loneliness in your head.

2. Write letters.

Go old fashioned. Buy stamps and envelopes. Write your family and friends handwritten letters. Use glitter, cut out hearts, and markers. Make it fun!

3. Go heart-attacking.

Cut out tons of hearts! Then you choose someone you care about: Your neighbor, your bishop, your best friend, your work. Take all the hearts and tape them everywhere! There is something really exciting about walking away from a door that is covered in hearts. One year my family and I bought a HUMONGOUS stuffed bear from the DI and dropped it off at our neighbors with a bunch of hearts. Best practical joke ever.

4. Treat yo'self.

Go shopping. Go see a movie. Take a reeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllllllllly long bath with bubbles and candles. Buy yourself a Coca-cola in the glass bottles. Pick up a dozen doughnuts. Wear something sparkly. Buy a new journal. (one of my favorite things to do) Remind yourself that YOU ARE WORTH IT and prove it to yourself.

5. Serve someone who DOES have a significant other.

Last year when I looked at my work schedule I saw I wasn't working on Valentine's. But when I saw who WAS, I realized that somebody's girlfriend was not going to be happy about it. Thinking about how service always chases out feelings of inferiority, I offered to take the last half of his shift so he could spend the evening with his girlfriend. Take one for the team. You'll feel SO happy about it. :)

6. Set-goals.

Feeling worthless because you're single? It's an easy rut to find yourself in. Think about where you'd like to improve. Setting new goals always gives me a rush! Always wished you were more fashionable? Then do it! Try new things, remix your wardrobe. Always wished you were more outgoing? Set a goal to meet 3 new people by St. Patrick's day! Choose something you've always wanted to do and set goals to do it.

Whatever you do, do it with a smile. Maybe Mr. or Mrs. Right hasn't appeared in your life yet, but there's no sense in being upset about it. (In fact that usually makes you less attractive!)

Serve someone, treat yourself, create an environment that you can have fun in. You deserve it!

YOU ARE WORTH IT!

say yes

It's the start of a new month, and not just any month, but the month of LOVE! Throughout January I've been evaluating my relationship with my husband Mr. Jolley, what can I improve on? What's his love language? What makes him most happy?

I realized something. I tell him NO a lot. And I want to change that.

I want to say YES to staying up a little later than normal to cuddle and watch TV.

I want to say YES to more outings with his family.

I want to say YES to more workouts, and healthier meals.

I want to say YES to opportunities to help him around the house.

I want to say YES to staying in my personal spending budget.

I want to say YES to inconvenient adventures he asks me to go on.

I want to say YES to more productive weekly planning like he desires.

I want to say YES to being a better wife.

What do you want to say YES to more in your relationship?

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New to the Marriage & Relationship Goals Link-up? Goals help our relationships grow stronger and get better with time as well as help us move forward and avoid the "ruts" of life. This link-up was created in hopes of inspiring your relationship with your significant other no matter your chapter in life and love. We would love for you to join us in making the things we do in our relationships intentional.  If you would like more information, click here. If you would like to sign up for the newsletter, click here. If you are interested in cohosting, click here.